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Adoption Process Birthmother

CAN I GET THE BABY BACK IN A FEW YEARS IF I PUT UP MY BABY FOR ADOPTION?

Occasionally, expectant mothers or birth mothers will ask us at Kirsh & Kirsh, PC (“Kirsh & Kirsh”) this question. The answer is “No.” Adoption creates a legal parent-child relationship between the adoptive parents and the child just as if they had given birth to the child and permanently terminates the parent-child relationship between the birth parents and the child. If a birth mother is not ready to parent her newborn and does not want her parental rights terminated, she should look into having a friend, or family member appointed guardian of the child or foster care through a local adoption agency. 

If you would like to explore adoption, we at Kirsh & Kirsh — or the “Kirsh Boys,” as the adoption attorneys at Kirsh & Kirsh are sometimes called – Steve, and his brothers, Joel and Rob, and his son, Grant, pride themselves on answering questions about adoption and explaining the process without pressure or judgment. 

The four adoption attorneys at Kirsh & Kirsh have over 100 years of combined legal experience arranging adoptions.  Kirsh & Kirsh has been in existence since 1981. As attorneys, we at Kirsh & Kirsh have very high standards for the prospective adoptive parents we choose to represent. All of our waiting families are carefully screened and thoroughly investigated. We will arrange for you to have contact with the family you choose on your terms, without families trying to reach you at all hours of the day or night. 

Our contact information is below. We will answer your questions and provide the information you seek without cost or obligation on your part. In other words, talking to us is FREE and does NOT mean you ever have to talk or text with us again. We can help you in finding an AMAZING, WONDERFUL adoptive home for your precious baby, whether you live in Zionsville or Indianapolis, Terre Haute or Bloomington, Vincennes or Evansville, Goshen or South Bend, Warsaw or Ft. Wayne, or any Indiana county or city in between, or ANYWHERE in Tennessee, Mississippi, Kentucky, Michigan, or Illinois.

There is always a family waiting to love your child. We have lots of family options from which you can choose, all of whom are wonderful, carefully screened, loving families FROM INDIANA AND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the fullest extent allowed by law. You make all the choices about which family adopts your baby and the extent of contact you want after the child’s birth.

You can call, text, or email us anytime – call/text: 800-333-5736, contact us, or send a Facebook message. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption.”  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby,” then our website will not show up in most expectant moms’ search results in Google.

Birthmother

WILL I GET INTO TROUBLE IF I TAKE LIVING EXPENSE MONEY FROM THE ADOPTIVE PARENTS AND DON’T PUT UP MY BABY FOR ADOPTION?

Each state has its own criminal statutes and definitions of what constitutes fraud. At the very least, it not right to take money from prospective adoptive parents without intending to give up the baby for adoption, or more correctly, make an adoption plan for the baby. Some states like Indiana, make it a FELONY for a woman pretending to be a birth mother or a birth mother to accept living expenses if she does not intend to make an adoptive placement or is not pregnant. See Indiana Code § 35-46-1-9.5. Besides possible jail time under the criminal statute, the defrauded adoptive parents can sue her for THREE TIMES the amount of money she took PLUS attorney fees under Indiana Code § 34-24-3-1.5.

On the other hand, if a woman sincerely intends to give up her baby for adoption and has an honest change of heart, she will not be in trouble. 

We, at Adoption Attorneys Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”), represent lots of carefully screened and fully investigated prospective adoptive parents who will gladly assist an expectant mother intending to proceed with an adoption, the full amount of living expenses allowable by law. Giving a family a baby who cannot give birth to one is as God-like as anything one person can do for another. 

If you would like to explore adoption, we at Kirsh & Kirsh — or the “Kirsh Boys,” as the adoption attorneys at Kirsh & Kirsh are sometimes called – Steve, and his brothers, Joel and Rob, and his son, Grant, pride themselves on answering questions about adoption and explaining the process without pressure or judgment. 

Our contact information is below. We will answer your questions and provide you with the information you seek, without cost or obligation on your part. In other words, talking to us is FREE and does NOT mean you ever have to talk or text with us, again. We can help you in finding an AMAZING, WONDERFUL, adoptive home for your precious baby, whether you live in Noblesville or Indianapolis, Shelbyville or Bloomington, Evansville or Newburgh, South Bend or Michigan City, Auburn or Ft. Wayne, or any Indiana county or city in between, or ANYWHERE in Tennessee, Mississippi, Kentucky, or Michigan.

There is always a family waiting to love your child. We have lots of family options from which you can choose, all of whom are wonderful, carefully screened, loving families FROM INDIANA AND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the fullest extent allowed by law. You make all the choices regarding which family adopts your baby & extent of contact you want after the child’s birth.

You can call, text, and or email us anytime -call/text: 800-333-5736, contact us, or Facebook message. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption.”  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby,” then our website will not show up in most expectant moms’ search results on Google.

Adoption Process Birthmother

I JUST HAD A BABY. CAN I PUT IT UP FOR ADOPTION EVEN THOUGH I HAVE NOT YET CONTACTED AN ADOPTION AGENCY?

Given our 90 years of combined legal experience arranging adoptions, the number of fully-screened, carefully investigated, and loving prospective adoptive parents we, at Adoption Attorneys Kirsh & Kirsh, PC, represent, and our efficiency and compassion in handling last-minute adoptions, we can make the arrangements on a moment’s notice. Some refer to these adoptions as “stork drops” or “surprise babies,” but no matter the name, these situations require urgent attention. For that reason, we at Kirsh & Kirsh do NOT rely on an answering service or voicemail even outside of regular office hours. A member of our full-time, regular office staff will answer a telephone call, usually within a couple of rings, without the caller having to go through an endless telephone tree. We also immediately respond to text messages and emails. 

If you would like to explore adoption, we will answer your questions and provide you with the information you seek without cost or obligation on your part. In other words, talking to us is FREE and does NOT mean you ever have to talk or text with us, again. We can help you in finding an AMAZING, WONDERFUL adoptive home for your precious baby, whether you are in Indiana, Tennessee, Mississippi, Kentucky, or Michigan.

There is always a family waiting to love your child. We have lots of family options from which you can choose, all of whom are wonderful, carefully screened, loving families FROM INDIANA AND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the fullest extent allowed by law. You make all the choices regarding which family adopts your baby & extent of contact you want after the child’s birth.

Call/text: 800-333-5736, contact us, or Facebook message. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption.”  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby,” then our website will not show up in most expectant moms’ search results on Google.

Adoption Process Birthmother

MY FRIEND SAID THAT PLACING MY BABY UP FOR ADOPTION IS THE LIKE GIVING THE BABY AWAY

“Giving away” suggests that you are discarding, of getting rid of, your baby, as you might with an old pair of sneakers. A birth mother who has the courage, strength, and fortitude to entrust the life of her precious child to another set of parents is NOT one who has GIVEN AWAY her child. She has put her child’s needs to have a loving, secure, home, with a lifetime of opportunities ahead of her own breaking heart. Several years ago, a birth mother said to us, at Adoption Attorneys Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”): “I have ALL THE LOVE IN THE WORLD for my baby, but LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH. I know that given where I am in my life, I will not have the time to give my child the attention that it needs.” At the time, the woman was a full-time nursing student. After placing up her baby for adoption, or more correctly, making an adoption plan for her baby, she completed her nursing degree.

If your friend thinks assuring your child will grow up in a happy, loving home with devoted parents who have the resources and time to attend to your child’s wants and needs is “giving away” the baby, your friend needs to rethink their choice of words, or you need to rethink how much weight you give to your friend’s words.

We, at Kirsh & Kirsh — or the “Kirsh Boys,” as the adoption attorneys at Kirsh & Kirsh are sometimes called – Steve, and his brothers, Joel and Rob, and his son, Grant, pride ourselves on answering questions about adoption and explaining the process without pressure or judgment. We cannot make adoption an easy choice, but we can make it less scary by removing some of the unknowns. Ultimately, a birth parent will have to decide if adoption is in their own best interests and the best interests of their child. We, at Kirsh & Kirsh, will not and cannot make that decision for anyone, but we can provide information and answers to questions – that way, you can make a well-informed decision.

Our contact information is below. We will answer your questions and provide you with the information you seek, without cost or obligation on your part. In other words, talking to us is FREE and does NOT mean you ever have to talk or text with us, again. The Kirsh Boys have 90 YEARS OF COMBINED EXPERIENCE practicing adoption law. We can help you in finding an AMAZING, WONDERFUL, adoptive home for your precious baby, whether you live in Lebanon or Indianapolis, Edinburgh or Columbus, Evansville or Sellersburg, or South Bend or Warsaw, Marion or Ft. Wayne, or any Indiana county or city in between, or ANYWHERE in Tennessee, Mississippi, Kentucky, or Michigan.

We have lots of wonderful, carefully screened, loving families, FROM INDIANA AND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the fullest extent allowed by law.

You can call, text, and or email us anytime -call: 317-575-5555, text: 317-721-2030, email: AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com, or Facebook message: https://www.facebook.com/KirshandKirsh/. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption”.  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby” then our website will not show up in most expectant moms’ search results in Google.

Adoption Process Birthmother

IF YOU ARE IN INDIANA, HOW CAN YOU HELP ME GIVE UP MY BABY FOR ADOPTION IF I LIVE IN TENNESSEE, MISSISSIPPI, OR KENTUCKY?

We, at Adoption Attorneys Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”), are based in Indiana, but one of our attorneys is also licensed to practice law in Kentucky, Tennessee, Mississippi, and soon in Michigan and Illinois. The “Kirsh Boys,” as the attorneys at Kirsh & Kirsh, are sometimes called by adoption professionals around the country – Steve Kirsh and his brothers, Joel and Rob Kirsh, and his son, Grant Kirsh, have over 90 years of combined experience handling adoptions. Furthermore, we represent prospective adoptive parents from all over the country.

Whether you live in Indiana, Mississippi, Tennessee, or Kentucky, we will take care of the arrangements for the adoption — providing you information about carefully screened, thoroughly investigated, prospective, adoptive parents, helping you qualify for Medicaid, assisting with living expenses, letting you choose your doctor and at what hospital you will deliver, arranging for you to speak with a counselor (only if you want) and your own, independent, non-Kirsh & Kirsh attorney, who can give you confidential, legal advice, without any cost on your part.

Our contact information is below.  We will answer your questions and provide you the information you seek, without cost or obligation on your part. In other words, talking to us is FREE and does NOT mean you ever have to talk or text with us, again. We can help you find an AMAZING, WONDERFUL, adoptive home for your precious baby, whether you live in Danville or Indianapolis, Bloomington or Greencastle, Evansville or Bloomington, or South Bend or Ft. Wayne, Richmond or Warsaw, or any Indiana county or city in between, or ANYWHERE in Tennessee, Mississippi, or Kentucky.

We have lots of wonderful, carefully screened, loving families, FROM INDIANA AND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the full extent allowed by law.

You can call, text, and or email us anytime –call: 317-575-5555, text: 317-721-2030, email: AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com, or Facebook message: https://www.facebook.com/KirshandKirsh/. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption”.  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby” then our website will not show up in most expectant mom’s search results in Google.

Birthmother

I AM REALLY UNCERTAIN ABOUT PUTTING MY BABY UP FOR ADOPTION. WHAT CAN I DO?

As the expression goes, “Information is Power.” GET MORE INFORMATION about adoption from a compassionate, kind, experienced, adoption professional. In our 90 years of combined, legal, experience arranging adoptions, we, at Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”) have identified the two most common reasons that make expectant mothers uncertain about giving a baby up for adoption, or more correctly, making an adoption plan for their children: Firstly, the obvious reason – adoption is an IMPOSSIBLY DIFFICULT DECISION and, secondly, they don’t have enough information, or worse, have the wrong information. Getting correct information WITHOUT FEELING PRESSURED, will NOT make adoption an easy decision, but it will enable you to decide based on fact, not fiction. Here is an example. Let’s say you needed to get a COVID vaccination, but a well-meaning, BUT UNINFORMED, close friend told you that after the nurse gave you the shot, she would cut off your arm. As much as you might have thought getting the vaccine was a good idea, you would probably not get the shot, if it meant having your arm amputated. There may be valid reasons not to get a COVID vaccination, but fear that you will have your arm cut off is not one of them. Likewise, many birth mothers have very good reasons, not to give up a baby for adoption, but not everything well-meaning friends have told you might be true. Even if you are really uncertain about adoption, contact an adoption professional to get correct information about the process. We, at Kirsh & Kirsh, will provide that information.

The “Kirsh Boys,” as the adoption attorneys at Kirsh & Kirsh, are sometimes called – Steve, and his brothers, Joel and Rob, and his son, Grant – pride themselves on answering questions about adoption and explaining the process without pressure or judgment. They cannot make adoption an easy choice, but they can make it less scary by removing some of the unknowns. Ultimately, a birth parent will have to decide if adoption is in their own best interests and the best interests of their child. We, at Kirsh & Kirsh, will not and cannot make that decision for anyone, but we can provide information and answers to questions.

Our contact information is below.  We will answer your questions and provide you the information you seek, without cost or obligation on your part. In other words, talking to us is FREE and does NOT mean you ever have to talk or text with us, again. The Kirsh Boys have 90 YEARS OF COMBINED EXPERIENCE practicing adoption law. We can help you find an AMAZING, WONDERFUL, adoptive home for your precious baby, whether you live in Logansport or Indianapolis, Columbus or Bloomington, Vincennes or Huntingburg, or Kokomo or Ft. Wayne, or any Indiana county or city in between, or ANYWHERE in Tennessee, Mississippi, or Kentucky.

We have lots of wonderful, carefully screened, loving families, FROM INDIANA AND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the full extent allowed by law.

You can call, text, and or email us anytime —call: 317-575-5555, text: 317-721-2030, email: AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com, or Facebook message:  https://www.facebook.com/KirshandKirsh/. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption”.  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby” then our website will not show up in most expectant mom’s search results in Google.

Birthmother

WHEN I TOLD THE FATHER OF THE BABY I WAS PREGNANT, HE THOUGHT I WAS LYING. CAN I STILL GIVE UP THE BABY FOR ADOPTION?

Yes. If you live in Indiana or place your baby up for adoption with an Indiana family and assuming the father of the baby has not legally established paternity of the child, meaning through a court proceeding or paternity affidavit, and assuming that you are not married to him, what the father of the baby believes does not matter. Of course, his accusing you of lying probably hurts your feelings, but under Indiana Law, an expectant mother or birth mother does not have to prove paternity of the child to proceed with an adoption. Furthermore, under Indiana Adoption Law, a birth mother does not need the consent to the adoption of a man who is not married to her or who has not established the paternity of the child, as explained above. In fact, he may not even be entitled to notice of the adoption.

Our contact information is below.  We will answer your questions and provide you the information you seek, without cost or obligation on your part. In other words, talking to us is FREE and does NOT mean you ever have to talk or text with us, again. Our adoption attorneys have 90 YEARS OF COMBINED EXPERIENCE practicing adoption law. We can help you find an AMAZING, WONDERFUL, adoptive home for your precious baby, whether you live in Kokomo or Indianapolis, Columbus or New Castle, Evansville or Scottsburg, or South Bend or Ft. Wayne, or any Indiana county or city in between, or ANYWHERE in Tennessee, Mississippi, or Kentucky.

We have lots of wonderful, carefully screened, loving families, FROM INDIANA AND ALL OVER THE COUNTRY(married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the full extent allowed by law.

You can call, text, and or email us anytime —call: 317-575-5555, text: 317-721-2030, email: AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com, or a Facebook message:  https://www.facebook.com/KirshandKirsh/. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption”.  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby” then our website will not show up in most expectant mom’s search results in Google.

Uncategorized

HOW DO I PUT UP A BABY FOR ADOPTION?

You can contact a local adoption agency, a national adoption agency, or an adoption law firm, like Adoption Attorneys Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”). Over the last 35+ years, we, at Kirsh & Kirsh, have helped numerous expectant mothers and birth mothers, throughout Indiana and other states, find loving, secure, happy homes for their precious, newborn babies.

Giving a baby up for adoption, or more accurately, making an adoption plan for your newborn, requires tremendous LOVE, courage, faith, and determination to put one’s child’s needs ahead of the desire to love and nurture one’s own child. NOTHING will or can make that decision – an act of sacrificial love — easy. However, working with experienced, kind, and caring adoption professionals like those at Kirsh & Kirsh can make it easier. We will never pressure or judge you. We will not make you fill out unnecessary paperwork or sit through endless counseling sessions (although we believe strongly in counseling for expectant mothers and birth mothers and make it available, free of charge, to those women who would like to give it a try).

We will answer your questions and provide you the information you seek, without cost or obligation on your part. To say it differently, talking to us costs you nothing nor does it mean you ever have to talk or text with us, again. We can assist you with an Indiana adoption no matter whether you live in Huntington or Seymour, Madison or Crown Point, Rochester or Vincennes, or any Indiana county or city in between.

We have lots of wonderful, carefully screened, loving families (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the full extent allowed by law.

You can contact us anytime —call: 317-575-5555, text: 317-721-2030, email: AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com, or a Facebook message:  https://www.facebook.com/KirshandKirsh/. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption.”  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby” then our website will not show up in most expectant mom’s search results in Google.

Birthmother

IF I USED DRUGS DURING MY PREGNANCY, CAN ADOPTION ATTORNEYS KIRSH & KIRSH, P.C. (“KIRSH & KIRSH”) STILL HELP ME PLACE MY NEWBORN FOR ADOPTION?

Yes, we can help you. Kirsh & Kirsh has lots of loving, carefully screened, prospective adoptive parents who have expressed interest in adopting babies exposed to drugs or born addicted to drugs. We have never known of an expectant mother who intentionally tried to hurt their unborn child by taking drugs, in our 35+ years of experience with numerous birth mothers. Drug addiction, something not easily overcome, does not prevent a baby momma from proceeding with an adoption unless the Indiana Department of Children Services (“DCS”) gets involved before arrangements for an adoption have been made. Therefore, if you think that you might give up your baby for adoption, put up your baby for adoption, or more correctly, make an adoption plan for your newborn baby, contact us, at Kirsh & Kirsh, as soon as possible in your pregnancy. The sooner we are involved, the less likely DCS will put the baby in foster care. Of course, babies have a way of coming when they are ready, and plans cannot always be made ahead of time. If you are late in your pregnancy or have already delivered, do not hesitate to contact us, or have the hospital social worker call us, as soon as possible. We have gotten many of the local DCS offices not to place babies in foster care if a birth mom asks us to find an adoptive home for her baby rather than let the baby go into the DCS department system.

We have lots of wonderful, carefully screened, loving families (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and are happy to assist with living expenses to the full extent allowed by law.

You can call, text, and or email us anytime —call: 317-575-5555, text: 317-721-2030, email: AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com, or a Facebook message:  https://www.facebook.com/KirshandKirsh/. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

POSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE DISCLAIMER:  Please understand that these blog posts are written in a way to use language that people use when searching for help with their adoption plans.  Unfortunately, while all of us understand what positive adoption language means, most expectant moms that come to us at first do not understand what that means. The most common search term on the Internet for expectant moms is “how do I give up my baby for adoption”.  If we do not include those words in our blog posts, and instead put “how do I create an adoption plan for my baby” then our website will not show up in most expectant mom’s search results on Google.

Birthmother

I Am Pregnant And Not Ready For A Baby But Don’t Know If I Can Place The Baby For Adoption

At the Adoption Law Firm of Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”) we have met literally numerous  of women over the last 35+ years who wanted information about giving up a baby for adoption, or more correctly, making an adoption plan for their soon-to-be-born, newborn babies, and young toddlers. Most, and probably all, of those women have had exactly the concern of whether they would actually be able to follow through with an adoption. To be clear, we are not psychologists, social workers, or counselors. What follows is a short summary of what those professionals have told us over the last 3 ½ decades that we have assisted adoptive parents and birth parents with arrangements for adoptions.

No two ways about it: if you place your baby for adoption, you will grieve the loss of your child much as you would grieve, or have grieved, the loss of a person close to you who passes away. Usually, grief does not last forever and lessens over time, but grief is real, and it is painful. We all grieve the deaths of people close to us. Usually, our degree of grief directly relates to our relationship with the deceased person. The closer the relationship – the more intense the grief. It is hard to imagine a relationship closer than between a mother and her child. Everyone handles grief differently, but you should assume your grief will be intense. However, because a decision is difficult or accompanied by grief, does not mean that decision is a bad one. Not all decisions are easy.

Unlike the example of a dying friend or relative, whether you decide to proceed with an adoption, parent the child, or make another choice, you have control over the decision, which means there will be consequences, which your choice has created, some of which will be SIGNIFICANT. If you decide to parent the child and find that you are not providing your child the life you believe your child deserves, how will you feel? How long will those feelings last? Will they lessen or intensify over time? Will you resent your child because the child prevented you from fulfilling your own dreams? If you have another child or children, what will adding a child to your home do to your ability to take care of that child or children? Of course, there are other options and feelings that will come into play. In other words, avoiding having to come to terms with the grief associated with adoption, does not necessarily mean the road is easy or stress-free, or even best for you. Only you can make that determination.

We encourage the expectant mothers who come to us to find homes for their newborns and young toddlers to speak with counselors to help them understand and deal with their feelings and emotions. Social workers often refer to the adoption decision as a struggle between one’s heart and head. The heart pulling in one direction and the head in another. We believe that counseling helps birth mothers make decisions that they can live with.

If you would like to explore adoption, in Indiana, Tennessee, Mississippi, Kentucky, or anywhere else in the country, without cost or obligation on your part, do not hesitate to contact us. We have helped numerous birth parents find wonderful, loving homes for their babies. We have lots of wonderful, carefully screened, loving families (married, single, Lesbian, and Gay) who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes and happy to assist with living expenses to the full extent allowed by law.

You can call, text, and or email us anytime —call: 317-575-5555, text: 317-721-2030, email: AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com, or a Facebook message:  https://www.facebook.com/KirshandKirsh/. We answer our office phone 24 hours a day, every single day. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.