Cairs Admin, Author at Loving Adoptions

How Will I Feel Years From Now, If I Give Up My Baby For Adoption?

If you make any life decision based upon solid reasons, those reasons will bring comfort when you question your decision. However, even the most rational, well-thought-out, righteous decision can also cause sadness. Undoubtedly, every woman who has ever placed a baby for adoption has second-guessed themselves and experienced feelings of grief and sadness. Certainly, if you do not give up, or more correctly, make an adoption plan for, your baby, you will not suffer the grief and sadness that goes along parting with your child. However, if handled correctly, the grief associated with placing a baby for adoption subsides. Like losing a close friend or relative to death, one does not forget the lost friend or relative, but the acute pain lessens over time. Many adoption counselors would say the same about the feelings of loss associated with adoption.

However, a woman who does not proceed with an adoption plan, does not assure herself of a lifetime of happiness as a parent. Parenting is hard in the best of circumstances. Parenting without long term support and resources (not just money) can cause a lifetime of grief and sadness. Watching a child grow up knowing that you are not providing your child with opportunities that will allow him or her to reach their potential in life can create feelings of guilty and intense sadness that do not diminish with time.

If you question your emotional, financial (and etc.) readiness to parent your soon-to-be-born baby, you should look into adoption with a reputable adoption agency or an experienced adoption attorney. Under Indiana, Mississippi, Tennessee, Kentucky law and the laws of most states, even if you wanted to commit to an adoption before that baby is born, you cannot.

We at Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”) work with expectant and birth mothers considering adoption throughout Kentucky, Mississippi, Tennessee and Indiana and have talked to many women like you. We have lots of loving, carefully screened and investigated, prospective, adoptive parents who cannot wait to welcome a baby into their hearts and homes. You will find that we are nice, knowledgeable, and completely non-judgmental. We never pressure you to choose adoption. We will treat you with kindness and respect. Frankly, many of the women with whom we talk and even meet decide not to proceed with an adoption plan. That’s fine. We will arrange for you to speak with a counselor and your own attorney, if you wish, at NO COST to you. At least then, you can make a better-informed decision – at decision you can live with.

You may contact us at Kirsh & Kirsh without cost or obligation on your part. Birth mothers NEVER pay a fee to Kirsh & Kirsh. See what we have to offer before making the most important decision of your life. You can call, text and or email us anytime. We answer our office phone, 317-575-5555, 24/7/365. We also promptly respond to text messages at 317-721-2030 and email at [email protected]. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.

A Family Approached Me About Letting Them Adopt My Baby – Should I Let Them?

While it may seem like a difficult or overwhelming task at first, the reality is if you are pregnant and thinking about giving up your baby for adoption (or more correctly – making an adoption plan) finding families wanting to adopt a baby is actually quite easy. Someone always knows someone, who knows someone, who wants a baby. Families hoping to adopt may have already approached you or had someone else approach you for them. It may help that your sister or best friend (or aunt, or co-worker, or friend of a friend, etc.) says that they think a particular family would provide a good home for your baby, but are you willing to, quite literally, entrust your child’s life to a person or persons based upon the recommendation of a well-intentioned, but untrained, friend? Do the prospective adoptive parents have health, marital, financial, or criminal problems? A history of substance or physical abuse? Those are not things that people typically disclose to others, particularly if they believe it would reflect on them poorly, and especially if they are wanting to adopt someone’s baby. (These things are, however, disclosed during the home study process.) Sure, you may want to help them, but ask yourself – what is most important to me? Helping a seemingly nice family or being confident you have found a safe, secure, loving home for your unborn baby? Wouldn’t you like to consider a number of already carefully, pre-screened prospective adoptive parents?

Placing a baby for adoption takes incredible courage, thoughtfulness, and most importantly trust that the adoptive parents will provide your child with the best life possible, with opportunities to enjoy life and reach their full potential. That is why you should consider working with a licensed, adoption agency or experienced adoption attorney, who can match you with those carefully screened and homestudy approved families.

We at Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”), have assisted numerous expectant and birth mothers find just the right family for their babies. We have four licensed attorneys in Indiana, one of whom is also licensed in Kentucky, Tennessee, and Mississippi. If you do not live in one of those states we can find an experienced adoption professional to assist you in your state of residence. We will provide you with profiles of lots of wonderful, carefully screened families, and if you would like, we will arrange for you to talk with them by telephone or meet them in person. Or, if you would rather, we will select a family for you. It is entirely your decision. Working with us gives you options for your baby’s future.

Time For Every Season

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven . . . .”

For years at Adoption Attorneys Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”), we have told our prospective adoptive parent clients to have faith that when “their” baby comes along, the baby will find his or her way into their hearts and homes. Likewise, we have assured birth mothers that when the “right” family comes along, the birth mother will just know.

Recently, at Kirsh & Kirsh, an adoptive mom came to visit with her beautiful and joyful 3-year-old daughter, who found her way into their family’s hearts and homes by what can only be described as divine intervention. About 3 years ago, a hospital social worker contacted us (we love hospital social workers!) and asked if we could find a family for a newborn, Chinese girl, with Down Syndrome and other medical complications.

Through our national networking efforts, we found the perfect family for our baby – wonderful family who had had previously adopted a Chinese, baby girl with Down Syndrome and other medical complications. Their previously adopted daughter thrived with the love and attention of the adoptive family. Furthermore, the prospective adoptive parents embraced the then current birth mother’s desire for openness in the adoption. After reading the family’s profile, the birth parents talked with the prospective adoptive parents by telephone and then met them in person.

As difficult as the decision was for them, the birth parents LOVED the adoptive parents and knew that the adoptive parents could provide the life, future, and opportunities they desperately want for their daughter. The birth mother and father both had full time jobs, and the birth mother also attended college full time. They loved their newly born daughter dearly, and as much as their hearts were telling them otherwise, they knew that they simply did not have the resources to provide for her in the way she would need. They wanted more for her than they could give, and in the most selfless act of love, put her needs before their own. The adoptive mom, her husband, and other children adore the newest edition to their family and could not appreciate more the loving sacrifice the birth mother and father made for their daughter and them.

We, Adoption Attorneys Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C., have handled more than 3500 successful adoptions over the last 35+ years. You can call, text and or email us anytime. We answer our office phone, 317-575-5555, 24/7/365. We also promptly respond to text messages at 317-721-2030 and email at [email protected]. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.